I Am Not An Expert Mum.

I am not an Expert Mum

On a trip to the nurse this week (jabs, ugh), the nurse said “Oh I do like it when the expert mums come in, it makes my job so much easier”. I was very quick to correct her that I am far from an expert and would, at best, describe myself as a practising novice. It got me thinking, is that what people see me as? Do people think that because I have created 4 (super amazing) children, that these 4 children are fed and clean (most of the time) and that they say their pleases and thank you’s, that I might have a clue as to what the hell this parenting malarkey is about?! I’m afraid I’m going to have to burst their bubble.

I am not an expert Mum by any stretch of the imagination, and people that do think they are experts at parenting kinda piss me off. To me, parenting is a combination of trial/error and common sense. People think that just because I’ve been there already (in some cases 4 times over), that I’m some sort of aficionado on child rearing. The honest truth is that while I have learnt from mistakes with one child, I have made different ones with the other. Sometimes I make the same mistake time and time again because I have simply forgotten how I did things with the last! Bloody baby brain.

I’m not a fan of giving advice either. It may be that I don’t have much confidence in myself, but I don’t always think that MY way is the BEST way. If asked “what would you do”, I would just relay what I did with each child and see if any of those appealed.

And I’m always trying to learn. Has anyone else noticed that “official advice” changes around every 3 years?! Use cot bumpers, don’t use cot bumpers, wrap them up, don’t wrap them up, wash them with this, no wash them with that. Its always changing!!! Plus, my kids are always growing, always changing and more often than not growing in different ways. Not all children will potty train/wean/walk at the same time as their little brother/sister so don’t assume that what you did last time is going to work this time (case in point being my 3 1/2 year old that still won’t sleep through the night while my 3 month old will). I always have a parenting book on the go, and I always re-read books too. I got “The Baby Whisperer” the other week from the library, only to skim through it as a refresher on what to do with Twiglet to get her into a bit more of a routine. I also got a book about tween behaviour, because knowledge is power!(as is control of the kindle charger).

In summary, no matter how many kids I have, no matter how many different situations I have been in, I am not an expert parent, and I doubt I will ever be.

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Twiglets Two Month Round Up

Time. Goes. So. Quickly. The last month has absolutely flown by. Twiglet has been to see all three of her siblings in their different Christmas plays, has been to all of their parent/teacher consultations and has done countless shopping trips trying to get ready for Christmas. She is much more alert now. We get smiles every time we gaze at her! She has just started to get into a bit of a routine with her “awake times” AND she is sleeping from 11-5/6am. She truly is a perfect baby.

two months

Here is the two month round up on my smallest little bundle:

Likes:

  • Smiling. She will even smile at the sound of our voices, without even seeing us!
  • Bunny. I crocheted her a little stuffed bunny and she is mesmorised by it.
  • The sling. A total essential when doing the school run (especially when I have 3 different classrooms to drop off to) and once I pop her in, she is asleep by the time I get to the end of the road.

Dislikes:

  • Wind. We are still suffering a little bit each night, but gripe water seems to cure it.
  • Her car seat. Screams as soon as she is put in it.
  • Christmas shoppers who seem to completely ignore her in the sling and bash into her without saying sorry.

Best moment of the last month:

  • Seeing that great big smile every day.

Worst moment of the last month:

  • Jabs. And the lurgy that followed.

I know Christmas is a busy time of year for us, and I’m hoping that that is why this last month has just flown by. I really hope that time isn’t going to go this quickly next year because I really feel like I’m so busy I don’t have time to really enjoy Twiglet. Any free time I do have is spent doing housework or shopping :-(. Hopefully Twiglet’s first Christmas will be a great time for all of us to spend some much needed quality time together and to try and slow life down a little!

Twiglet, The One Month Round Up

I can’t believe that it has been an entire month since Twiglet was born. It has gone so so so quickly! She has already grown out of some clothes, is holding her head up for longer periods of time and is smiling! It is the cutest thing EVER! (Well apart from my other gorgeous bunnies, who are also super cute).

1month

So…………..here is my one month round up on my smallest little bundle:

Likes:

  • Milk, but only from a Dr Browns bottle, natch.
  • Her big brother, I think it’s something to do with those big rimmed glasses
  • Daddies boomy voice, I’m putting this down to the skin to skin she got from Daddy in the operating theatre.

Dislikes:

  • A clean nappy. Pooing in a clean nappy is much more fun.
  • Wind.
  • Match Of The Day, oh no wait, that’s Mummy

Best moment of the last month:

  • Meeting her brothers and sisters (oh and Mum and Dad of course)

Worst moment of the last month:

  • Catching a cold and having a bunged up nose 😦

 

I have to say that the first month of having Twiglet isn’t quite what I was expecting. Newborn babies I know how to handle, I totally have that shiz down. Handling a 3yo, a 6yo and a 9yo I can do spinning on my t&^s. Doing both, at the same time, while juggling Christmas shopping, school plays, parent/teacher meetings and everything else, is not so easy. Thank god for coffee……………..and wine!

 

This post is part of a Linky:

You Baby Me Mummy

Binky Linky

Mummy and Monkeys

Don’t Worry – I’ve Got Your Back

Why is it that kids never grow out of putting you in awkward positions? And no, not in a “yoga” kind of way. But in a squeaky bum, this is so embarrassing, ground please swallow me up, kind of way.

When Little Miss was small, we were waiting in the queue at the shops when she said “ugh Mum, that man is so fat!” and pointed to the person in front of us. Mortified, I quickly rectified her behaviour with “it’s not nice to say that word about anyone, and that’s a woman, not a man”.

When Tiny Miss was asked to bring in a plastic bottle for a nursery project, she told the teacher “we only have green glass ones for Mummy’s wine”. FFS.

Add this to the millions of tantrums, refusing to go out in anything other than their pants and the general puke/poo/wee stained clothes that one or all of us end up wearing, and it’s pretty obvious that parenting is simply surviving one embarrassing moment after another.

But the embarrassment is just the start. It’s when they pull you out of your own comfort zone that you really have to take your own insecurities and push them to one side. Those times when you have to go trick or treating (knocking on peoples doors and asking them to feed your children? Weird). Those times when you have to turn up to toddler group and know NO ONE. Those times where you have to take your child swimming dressed in hardly anything with the WORLDS BIGGEST BODY HANGUPS!

Today is one of those days. One of those “please don’t make me, please don’t make me, please don’t make me” days where you know your child has to come first and your personal insecurities second. JJ has been moved in class and doesn’t like who he is sitting next to. Like, really doesn’t like them. He comes home crying because they call him this, or they ruin his work, or they distract him so he gets things wrong. So now I have to speak to the teacher to ask for him to be moved (he has already asked himself and she said no). I don’t want to ask. I don’t want to see his teacher. And I definitely don’t want to walk past the “other Mums” in case they think I’m complaining about their kids.

Unfortunately, I’ve got no choice. Because I am Mum. And no matter what, I always have to have their backs.

Wish me luck!!!!

 

This post is part of a Linky:

Best of Worst